Greeting Earthlings! =)
Right now, I'm still stuck in this IIUM planet...Tomorrow, I'm going to another planet named Putrajaya...hehe. I'm going to visit my best ever friend in this planet ---> Nani. Plus, I wanna repeat my Quranic memorization...insyaAllah...
Well, i just finished my final paper last saturday. I am supposed to go back to my home, but still stuck because of this experimental crap. So this is how the story goes:
Last week, I was excited to finish my exams because I joined a program called "Bakti Siswa ke Pelantok". Then on 15th April, which was Wednesday, I received a message, informed that for the petition of Experimental class, there will be a re-check on marks. So we will have to recheck it on our own, according to the rubric that will be produced by the department.
hmmm...I thought of just to let it go, but then this guy adviced me to wait and do the rechecking because it is which will not occur all the time. So i decided to give it a shot. The problem is that: this RUBRIC is not out until now! (the moment I wrote this entry!)
The question is: how long do I have to wait?
So I decided to go to Putrajaya and not to stay in this planet. I like to stay here because I get time for myself...all alone. And I like! When I am alone, I get to do whatever I like and no one is going to order or tell me what to do...it is freedom. However, I do like to be with people. Only sometimes, I need time for myself. Just like now.
I need time to think for the next step of my life. What I'm going to do, how to polish back what I've learnt in life so far...there are a lot of thing to be considered...that is why I need time to be alone...And yes, I agreed with what my lecturer said: Loneliness is solitude...and indeed, it is =)
I decided to go back on the 28th, after I have settled everything...then I will go back...InsyaAllah...
And there is something juicy going on in my life... The mystery guy wanted to meet with me this coming weekend... I still cannot decide whether I want to meet him or not...Haiya! So fickle-minded of me...
And another one more juicy thing: I gave 'the guy' a card for his farewell. In this card, there is a letter which I stated about what I felt towards him (but not that obvious...duh!). And his response: he told me that there are some part which he did not understand. And when I asked him, he did not reply. Haiz....nevermind la...
I was thinking whether to take someone who likes you or someone who you like? hmmm...
Monday, April 20, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Suratan atau Kebetulan?
Hye peeps!
It have been long since the last time I post an entry...been a bit busy with exams...left 2 more papers...All the best for me =)
Oh ya...last night, someone smsed me...someone who i thought had gone from my life...
He text me around midnite...during that tyme, I was asleep but then awake becoz of the msg...hehe
We talked and talked...it was quite surprise because he begin the sms with the info that he got married. haha...
In my heart, i was like: "Who cares?" hahaha
Then in the middle of our conversation, he told me something which he was supposed have done in a few years of our friendship...he told me that he LIKES me...
and how did i react to this?
Well...i just told him that I just knew it. But couldn't do anything. because he is married.
Hmmm... he is just not the one. I didn't even get the chance to meet him. Our relationship just based on the hp. We never met. Talked for several times on the phone. And uncountable time of sms.
I trust him eventhough i knew there is always a risk when you befriended with someone who you rarely know.
But i didn't really care how he thinks of me and the way he treated me. I just know that he is my friend and i like him as a friend.
Ok. that's all for this entry. Gotta go back and have my lunch. Damn hungry. Toodle-looo....
It have been long since the last time I post an entry...been a bit busy with exams...left 2 more papers...All the best for me =)
Oh ya...last night, someone smsed me...someone who i thought had gone from my life...
He text me around midnite...during that tyme, I was asleep but then awake becoz of the msg...hehe
We talked and talked...it was quite surprise because he begin the sms with the info that he got married. haha...
In my heart, i was like: "Who cares?" hahaha
Then in the middle of our conversation, he told me something which he was supposed have done in a few years of our friendship...he told me that he LIKES me...
and how did i react to this?
Well...i just told him that I just knew it. But couldn't do anything. because he is married.
Hmmm... he is just not the one. I didn't even get the chance to meet him. Our relationship just based on the hp. We never met. Talked for several times on the phone. And uncountable time of sms.
I trust him eventhough i knew there is always a risk when you befriended with someone who you rarely know.
But i didn't really care how he thinks of me and the way he treated me. I just know that he is my friend and i like him as a friend.
Ok. that's all for this entry. Gotta go back and have my lunch. Damn hungry. Toodle-looo....
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Dreamzzzz...
Today I went to my grandma's house...stayed there from 1230pm till 6 pm...
Had a really tiring day coz had to take care of these cute little boys...there were a lot of quarrels, cryings going on, but soon settled with laughter and smiles...well, they are children after all...
While at my grandma's house, something happened. I was so sleepy that I went to have my afternoon nap, around 4+ pm. Then, I had this strange (+ wonderful) dream. ANd FYI > it is really rare for me to have or to remember my dreams...so I was shocked.
Plus, this dream which I had, was somehow questionable. Ok, this is what I dream: the only thing that I could recall is that I was hugging with a guy...I cant remember his face...but the only thing that I know that I felt very happy the moment I woke up...LOL...
Oh ya, and I just had a short telephone conversation with 'the guy'. We talked about many things but just for a short time. The actual reason for me to call him is because I wanted to convey a message from someone. Then, he asked for my opinions on what I think of him. He also tell me that he will feel sad because this is his last semester. Soon he will have to work. I gave him supports and some motivational advices (is it that what friends are suppossed to do?) and I think that I like him. YEah...couldn't deny it anymore...but this feeling is new so I will try to manage it well. I didn't want to lie to myself because that is what I felt.
Must be true to yourself, and everything will be fine. Insya-Allah...
+ Kalau ada jodoh, tak ke mana. Tawakal kena tinggi, beb =)
Had a really tiring day coz had to take care of these cute little boys...there were a lot of quarrels, cryings going on, but soon settled with laughter and smiles...well, they are children after all...
While at my grandma's house, something happened. I was so sleepy that I went to have my afternoon nap, around 4+ pm. Then, I had this strange (+ wonderful) dream. ANd FYI > it is really rare for me to have or to remember my dreams...so I was shocked.
Plus, this dream which I had, was somehow questionable. Ok, this is what I dream: the only thing that I could recall is that I was hugging with a guy...I cant remember his face...but the only thing that I know that I felt very happy the moment I woke up...LOL...
Oh ya, and I just had a short telephone conversation with 'the guy'. We talked about many things but just for a short time. The actual reason for me to call him is because I wanted to convey a message from someone. Then, he asked for my opinions on what I think of him. He also tell me that he will feel sad because this is his last semester. Soon he will have to work. I gave him supports and some motivational advices (is it that what friends are suppossed to do?) and I think that I like him. YEah...couldn't deny it anymore...but this feeling is new so I will try to manage it well. I didn't want to lie to myself because that is what I felt.
Must be true to yourself, and everything will be fine. Insya-Allah...
+ Kalau ada jodoh, tak ke mana. Tawakal kena tinggi, beb =)
That path....
Salam people...
Right now, I'm in S'pore, having a short break from exams....I have this 10 days of exam gaps...
At first. I don't want to go back, because I want to study. But my parents came to KL on Sunday, and they ask me whether I would like to follow them back or not. At first, I was like...."ermmm...let me think about it first k..." Later that night, I decided to go back. I cannot find any reasons on why I want to go back. It is just a sudden decision and I lyke!
I rarely make a sudden decision because I'm a fickle-minded person. And I think that I wanna change. Yeah....I want to make changes within myself. It is not that I don't like myself, but I just feel that I need to change. I want to stop all these crappy things that I have been doing...such as wasting my time, living without goals, gossiping about people etc.
I realized this thing after I watched a Japanese drama titled 'Rookies'. It was a good drama that make me realized something I would have done it a looooong time ago. But, I know that it is not too late for me. I still have time to grab my opportunity. I want to make changes within myself and bring or do some changes to others' lives. It does not matter who the others are. What matter is I want to give. Yeah....just like one of the famous Ustaz quoted: "Erti hidup pada memberi" which means "The meaning of life is on what you give".
And yes, I have been doing a lot of thinking nowadays. There are many thoughts been floating inside my mind. The thoughts of my future plans, my exams, my interests ----> the third species.
If you have read my previous post, you would have notice one of my entry, talking about these species. I don't want to elaborate much about them. I don't know why I interested in them. The only thing I know that I am curious to know on how their mind really work. Recently, I visited some these species' blogs. It was beyond my expectation, because I didn't expect. I just did some blog readings and accidently encountered it. And as what expected from them, most of them lived based on desires. They changed partners, hunted for new and good looking men... And yes, of course I am being judgmental. Don't you worry cause that is one of my specialities *winks*.
Enough about them...Now I would like to update about my relationship progress.
I have to admit that I am not good in the romance thingy. It is just not my interest and I know that I will have to learn a lot about it. I once talked to my friend about it and she said that I have to learn. and YES, there are a lot of things that I must learn.
About 'the guy', I have did uncountable of istikharah and I still have to continue to do it till I made up my mind about him. But in the meantime, just let the matter rest for awhile. If he did feel the same way, he will know what to do.
Oh ya...I think that Im gonna feel sad because one of my close-frens is going to graduate. We fought a lot, always arguing...but deep down inside, I love her as my own sister. I do not know how to express and like I mentioned. I have a looot to learn for this musy-mushy stuffs.
k la, continue next entry. will be going back to IIUM this Friday & for now, just live the present and for the future!!!
----------------
Now playing: Faizal Tahir - Cuba
via FoxyTunes
Right now, I'm in S'pore, having a short break from exams....I have this 10 days of exam gaps...
At first. I don't want to go back, because I want to study. But my parents came to KL on Sunday, and they ask me whether I would like to follow them back or not. At first, I was like...."ermmm...let me think about it first k..." Later that night, I decided to go back. I cannot find any reasons on why I want to go back. It is just a sudden decision and I lyke!
I rarely make a sudden decision because I'm a fickle-minded person. And I think that I wanna change. Yeah....I want to make changes within myself. It is not that I don't like myself, but I just feel that I need to change. I want to stop all these crappy things that I have been doing...such as wasting my time, living without goals, gossiping about people etc.
I realized this thing after I watched a Japanese drama titled 'Rookies'. It was a good drama that make me realized something I would have done it a looooong time ago. But, I know that it is not too late for me. I still have time to grab my opportunity. I want to make changes within myself and bring or do some changes to others' lives. It does not matter who the others are. What matter is I want to give. Yeah....just like one of the famous Ustaz quoted: "Erti hidup pada memberi" which means "The meaning of life is on what you give".
And yes, I have been doing a lot of thinking nowadays. There are many thoughts been floating inside my mind. The thoughts of my future plans, my exams, my interests ----> the third species.
If you have read my previous post, you would have notice one of my entry, talking about these species. I don't want to elaborate much about them. I don't know why I interested in them. The only thing I know that I am curious to know on how their mind really work. Recently, I visited some these species' blogs. It was beyond my expectation, because I didn't expect. I just did some blog readings and accidently encountered it. And as what expected from them, most of them lived based on desires. They changed partners, hunted for new and good looking men... And yes, of course I am being judgmental. Don't you worry cause that is one of my specialities *winks*.
Enough about them...Now I would like to update about my relationship progress.
I have to admit that I am not good in the romance thingy. It is just not my interest and I know that I will have to learn a lot about it. I once talked to my friend about it and she said that I have to learn. and YES, there are a lot of things that I must learn.
About 'the guy', I have did uncountable of istikharah and I still have to continue to do it till I made up my mind about him. But in the meantime, just let the matter rest for awhile. If he did feel the same way, he will know what to do.
Oh ya...I think that Im gonna feel sad because one of my close-frens is going to graduate. We fought a lot, always arguing...but deep down inside, I love her as my own sister. I do not know how to express and like I mentioned. I have a looot to learn for this musy-mushy stuffs.
k la, continue next entry. will be going back to IIUM this Friday & for now, just live the present and for the future!!!
----------------
Now playing: Faizal Tahir - Cuba
via FoxyTunes
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Just a peek...
Peace be upon you people =)
Just had my second paper this morning and it was ok-ok la...hehe...
And before the exam, I received sms from 'the guy', wishing me luck for my paper =)
Now, I have 10 days gap for my next paper...I have a loooooooooot of time to study and revise for my remaining papers....
Ok la,got to go. wanna have dinner with my roomies...weeee~
Just had my second paper this morning and it was ok-ok la...hehe...
And before the exam, I received sms from 'the guy', wishing me luck for my paper =)
Now, I have 10 days gap for my next paper...I have a loooooooooot of time to study and revise for my remaining papers....
Ok la,got to go. wanna have dinner with my roomies...weeee~
Thursday, April 2, 2009
If only he knew...
Another 1 more day to my finals...yeah, tomorrow is my first paper & still do not know how to study..it is the LE 4000 paper...and I did not expect it to be easy, but tonight, I will gonna have to read Readers' Digest a looooot...and add ups on my vocabularies...insyaAllah...
Ok, right now, I'm sitting at the HS lab, and sitting in front of me is 'the guy' and well....hmmm... just like the title stated..if only...
Stop it, Fadiah...
Probably I should stop my nonsense dreams...I know it is good to have dreams, because through dreams, you will have a purpose of life...
Yesterday, I had a conversation with my old old friend...and it was a nice conversation...I shared with her my story...and she, well sort of advising me, said that I have to stop taking the first step...and I found out that, indeed, in my previous relationships, I was the one who would make the first step...it was always me...and she is correct...so, stop it, Fadiah.
I just realized that if a guy fall for you, he will know what to do...we don't have to teach him or ask him...he will know it by himself...just like us, if we want something, we would grab it without others teach or force us to do...
So, the time will come, Fadiah....just pray and never ever give up...If he is the one for you, then he will know what to do =)
Ok...so after this, I will have to submit my final group assignment & go back straight to my room and do a lot of reading... (takde kene-mengena pun dgn citer tadi...haha)
All the best for me! *wink*
Ok, right now, I'm sitting at the HS lab, and sitting in front of me is 'the guy' and well....hmmm... just like the title stated..if only...
Stop it, Fadiah...
Probably I should stop my nonsense dreams...I know it is good to have dreams, because through dreams, you will have a purpose of life...
Yesterday, I had a conversation with my old old friend...and it was a nice conversation...I shared with her my story...and she, well sort of advising me, said that I have to stop taking the first step...and I found out that, indeed, in my previous relationships, I was the one who would make the first step...it was always me...and she is correct...so, stop it, Fadiah.
I just realized that if a guy fall for you, he will know what to do...we don't have to teach him or ask him...he will know it by himself...just like us, if we want something, we would grab it without others teach or force us to do...
So, the time will come, Fadiah....just pray and never ever give up...If he is the one for you, then he will know what to do =)
Ok...so after this, I will have to submit my final group assignment & go back straight to my room and do a lot of reading... (takde kene-mengena pun dgn citer tadi...haha)
All the best for me! *wink*
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Study la...
Right now, in my room, connected to the internet through Sarah's wireless...all the people were out...except for me...didnt want to follow because i am too lazy to go out. Besides that, I need some space for myself and I need to study! LOL...
Just spent 2 hours of studying, then I get bored easily...hmmm..need to motivate myself more... Need to think of my parents' investments on my studies, need to think of the real purpose of my studies....if I think of those things, the spirit will increase but a bit only...hehe
Plus, as human, we definitely can't study for more than 2 hours, right? even in classes/tutorials, it will be conducted not more than 2 hours, because after that, our concentration will travel to somewhere else...so for my own convenience, I will make myself study for one or one & half hour, then I will take some rest for a couple of hour, then will continue on my study track again...I don't want to limit my rest, becoz it will be useless for me. I would not follow the rules...haha
So besides than study, what else did I do today?
Hmmm...let see...I logged into FB, put on some comments, did some laundry in the morning, did some room cleaning, went to the cafe for Brunch, stared at books for several hours...that's all I think..
And oh yeah, I received SMS from Ammori, wishing all the best for my finals...hehe
He is the only one who did that so far...really appreciate it...
And about that guy, I decided to give it a rest. I did some istikharah and found that this feelings is becoming more neutral... Alhamdulillah...Well, ALLAH always know what's the best for me =)
ok. that's all for now. gotta switch back my study mode. hehe. Pray for me ya!
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