Hati & yang sewaktu dengannya

Assalammualaikum


Kadang2 ada mata, tapi tak nampak

Kadang2 ada telinga, tapi tak dengar

Kadang2 ada hati, tapi tak rasa

Mungkin kerana diri ini JAUH dari Tuhan

Sebab itu tak dapat nak nampak, dengar dan rasa dgn BETOL



Aku bertanya pada seorang teman:

"Macam mana kita nak lupakan orang ye?"

Dia menjawab:

"Berbual dgn Tuhan, kak. Minta tolong dgn DIA. Sebab hanya DIA yang boleh bantu kuatkan diri kita."


Betul la.

AKu jauh dari Tuhan.

Tapi kini aku kembali.

Sudikah KAU menerima ku? :_(

Mistakes

Assalamualaikum...

"Mistakes are proof that we are trying..."


"Do not called it mistake but called it an experience..."


There are sooooo many things that people do just to make others feel good about themselves after they have done something which is wrong....

Just like myself.

After we did something that is wrong, we will always said this to ourselves:

Never mind. It is just a mistake. Everybody make mistakes. Try not to repeat it again.

But somehow, we will repeat it sooner or later. UNLESS we are truly regret it and promise to ourselves (which is a REAL promise) not to repeat it eventhough we will have to die by not doing it.

I have done sooooooooooo many mistakes throughout the 25 years of my life...

And there are some mistakes which I really really really regret it, and there are some which I enjoyed not really regret, but I have my OWN reason of doing it...

Do I sounds evil?

I hope not, coz I am not evil. I am just being myself.

And again, there are some mistakes which I did it on purpose just for the sake of learning....

I do not actually bother what others wanna say, coz whatever it is, all are depends on ME.

I am the one who can really decide whether I want to be good or bad, innocent or daredevil, liar or sincere etc.

Others may have the power to influence me. but I have the right to decide.

And yes, later in the hereafter, when I will be asked on my past actions during my life... I am the one who will answer it.

Coz I do not want to blame others. After all, I am responsible for everything that happened it my life.

And YOU, just sit back and enjoy the ShoW. Thank You =)

H. U. M. A. N.

"Seek first to understand, than understood"

After all these years, studying Psychology in IIUM, I cannot help myself not to agree with this statement.

You need to understand first before making conclusion.

You need to understand first before throwing assumption.

You need to understand first before giving opinion.

But we as human, often forget to understand OTHERS. We always think about ourselves first.

When we do this, we often saying things that we THOUGHT that we know. But instead, it is only our ASSUMPTION and mere opinions.

Some might asked: "I have been living with A for so long. And until now, I could not understand A. I had tried so hard to understand, but I can't."

Well, here are some tips in order to understand people:

1. Must bare in mind that it will be tough because people CHANGE and they will not appear 100% of themselves.

2. Bare in mind also that we could NOT understand them fully.

3. Always keep trying and never ever give up.

4. Pray to ALLAH and ask for HIS help as we are always in need of HIS help.


If these steps won't help you, then maybe you could consult others for better suggestion.

Remember that, understand and love others are more important rather than condemning and making assumption through their actions.

Human CHANGE because of some reasons. + Don't ever compare others with yourself, because each of us are different and have our own uniqueness. Find others' uniqueness and you will see the beauty of ALLAH's creations ;)

All these are also my opinions. I wrote out of my understandings of human, through observation and experiences.

Only ALLAH knows what is the best. *winks*

Confusion

Feelings sometimes can be confused...

That is why, never ever ever, trust your feeling fully.

It can be trusted unless if it is followed by prayers and guidance from God.

If not, just let it go cause it will change SOONER or LATER.

Imperfection

HoLa peePs!

And when ourselves are imperfect, why do we always want others to be perfect?

Coz that what we ARE.

Human always want everything to be perfect, pretty, good, awesome, marvellous etc....

BUT we always forget that we are not.

THEREFORE,

Always ask for things that SUITABLE with yourself,

not what you WANT them to be.

Silence

SOmetimes moment of silent is the best moment of all....

And certain things are better left unsaid...

That are some motivational quotes as reinforcement for me to be quiet...

Since I lived in this world, I have done a lot of talking. And yes, we REALLY need to talk in order to make others understand us. However, sometimes too much of talking is also not good. And I've experienced that a LooooooooooooT...

I admit that I've make a lot of mistakes through talking and being loud. I am really and truly regret it. Because most people always could not handle the truth. They like to keep things to themselves rather that sharing it with others. Sometimes I am also like that. Therefore, I must try as hard as I can to know where and when I am supposed to voice out my opinion.

Luckily that I have this one assignment for the Psychology of Learning. It is called 'Behaviour Modification', where you have to choose one behaviour that you desired to change. And I believe that I really need to change myself in terms of my talkativeness.

Pray for me ya ;)

Month of Forgiveness and Mercy

We are now entering the Holy month of Ramadhan...

Am preparing myself to enter the battlefield with my own desire...

Must increase my discipline and self-awareness...

Must increase my passion in doing good deeds and spread love...

Must stop wasting my time...

and

Be a Good Muslimah and Servant to Allah...

Ameen =)

Square One

Wherever you are in this world or no matter how far you go, you will always back to the One and only Lord, the Most Gracious and Merciful...

He is the One who will always be us, no matter what.

Although most of the time, we tend to forget Our creator, He will never ever forget us. Although we ran as far as we could away from Him, He will never ever leave us. because He is Our Lord. He would never abandon us because He is the Most Merciful. If our sins are as wide as the sea, He will forgive us, as long as we are truthful and sincere. Just look on how merciful our Lord is. He still gives oxygen and the ability to live to those who disbelieve Him.

Ponder and think. We will find Him. InsyaAllah.

TriaLs

*Sick*

*Lost*

*Alone*

*Broken-heaRted*

*Back-Stabbed*

*Bankrupt*

And when all these happened, there will always be the One Who will stay with you forever...HE is The ONE...

Grateful

Some may want things that they could not get, but some may do not want things that they already have...is it so hard to be grateful?

And yes, sometimes I find that it is hard. because I am also like that.

I do not like to have many attention. Today, I went out with my girlfrenz and I informed my mom that I'm gonna be back a little bit late, around 9-10 pm. Then she asked me a lot of questions: why..with who..etc... I was pissed off for a while. But then I realized something. There were people who did not get like what I got right now. Some are cRAVe for attention that they are willing to do anything, in order to get attention from people..and yet myself, are not grateful enough for the attention that I got. Hmmm...

Then, I keep telling myself...those attention showed that they care for you...and yes, they really care for me to the extend that sometimes I am sick of it...

Welcome to my Life, peeps =)

C. H. O. I. C. E. S.

To live hell or live well ----> You choose.

In life, most of the things that appeared to us involved choices. And in making choices, it is important for us to choose wisely.

I have made some wrong choices, therefore I decided from this very moment, I'm going to try make some good and wise choices. InsyaAllah....

Last few days, I have been busy teaching Qur'anic recitation with my aunty...She was amazing, MasyaAllah... At first, I thought that her Qur'anic recitation skill is weak...but then, I discovered that her reading was quite good...only her pronunciation and speed need to be improved.

Besides teaching. I also got the opportunity to meet with my old2 frens. They are still doing well and standing strong. MasyaAllah....unlike me, who always faced with doubts and confusion. The chance to meet with them is such a blessing for me. If I did not meet them, I would not realize something....and now, thanks to Allah for all His blessings and wills.

I realized that I have lost something that is so valuable to me ----> the blessings of Allah and fear towards Him.

I do not want to sound like a pious person, however this is the fact that I faced. No one, but me.

I was too busy in finding the perfect man for me, thus I forgot to seek help from Him. HE always there for me. Waiting for me to find Him. However, I am too arrogant and proud of myself. I forgot everything about Him, whereas He never ever forget me.

And whenever I got to know with someone, I forgot to thank Him. I based all the results on my actions and effort....and indeed, when the effort is empty, so will the result be.

From now on, I will try my best to be a good muslimah. InsyaAllah.

I do not want to get something which I want, but I want things that I NEED. Allah knows what best for me. So I will rest my future in His hand. but this does not mean that I gave up on trying. NO. I will try, strive, struggle and grab for the best. I wanted to GIVE more and more. Because that is what life is all about.

and one of the important choices which I made today: not to get involved with Guys anymore. Friends = yes. More than friends = NO.

You may find me boring. Sued me. but I am not gonna move as that is my decision. If there is someone out there for me, he will appear one day. I believed that. InsyaAllah.

One more thing, I have to build a wall between me and W. It is for my own good. So the construction will begin next semester. Hopefully.

Ok la...I gotta go to bed coz I have to get up at 230. Going to the airport, to send off my cousin.

and...yeah. A recent news stated today that the king of POP, Michael Jackson, have his eternal sleep forever, or in another word, he died..hehe

Well, seems like people keep going to meet with the Lord...and I am still waiting for my time.

May Allah bless YOu!

Whatever...

Do not hate people, Fadiah....

Yeah...i know that hatred is not good, but somehow I cant control it...

I've tried many ways...avoidance, neglect him...but still, i cant get him out of my mind...

Come on la, Fadiah...try your best and take those who love you...not those who you loved...

today, i had my midterm...yesterday, i could not study at all...i was reading the notes for today midterm and yet, my mind was wandering around on the thoughts of him and what we had done...

O Allah...help me please....

Decision

In life, there will be time for you to make decisions. Be it an important one or not, decisions will always be things that will affect your life.

The same goes with me. There are a looooooot decisions that I have to make such as to continue my studies, having relationship with someone etc.

Recently, I made a decision to meet with someone who i rarely know... We went out and he brought me around kL...i went back around 4 am...and yes, I admit that I am crazy. But trusting someone who rarely know, is it wrong?

I'm not sure of my true feelings towards him. The only thing that I know that I trust him as long as he is sincere with me...I did not force him to contact me or become close to me. If he want to, then it is my pleasure. But if he want to stop, then it is my pleasure to stop. I am not the one who will do something that someone else did not want to....

That path....

Salam people...

Right now, I'm in S'pore, having a short break from exams....I have this 10 days of exam gaps...

At first. I don't want to go back, because I want to study. But my parents came to KL on Sunday, and they ask me whether I would like to follow them back or not. At first, I was like...."ermmm...let me think about it first k..." Later that night, I decided to go back. I cannot find any reasons on why I want to go back. It is just a sudden decision and I lyke!

I rarely make a sudden decision because I'm a fickle-minded person. And I think that I wanna change. Yeah....I want to make changes within myself. It is not that I don't like myself, but I just feel that I need to change. I want to stop all these crappy things that I have been doing...such as wasting my time, living without goals, gossiping about people etc.

I realized this thing after I watched a Japanese drama titled 'Rookies'. It was a good drama that make me realized something I would have done it a looooong time ago. But, I know that it is not too late for me. I still have time to grab my opportunity. I want to make changes within myself and bring or do some changes to others' lives. It does not matter who the others are. What matter is I want to give. Yeah....just like one of the famous Ustaz quoted: "Erti hidup pada memberi" which means "The meaning of life is on what you give".

And yes, I have been doing a lot of thinking nowadays. There are many thoughts been floating inside my mind. The thoughts of my future plans, my exams, my interests ----> the third species.

If you have read my previous post, you would have notice one of my entry, talking about these species. I don't want to elaborate much about them. I don't know why I interested in them. The only thing I know that I am curious to know on how their mind really work. Recently, I visited some these species' blogs. It was beyond my expectation, because I didn't expect. I just did some blog readings and accidently encountered it. And as what expected from them, most of them lived based on desires. They changed partners, hunted for new and good looking men... And yes, of course I am being judgmental. Don't you worry cause that is one of my specialities *winks*.

Enough about them...Now I would like to update about my relationship progress.

I have to admit that I am not good in the romance thingy. It is just not my interest and I know that I will have to learn a lot about it. I once talked to my friend about it and she said that I have to learn. and YES, there are a lot of things that I must learn.

About 'the guy', I have did uncountable of istikharah and I still have to continue to do it till I made up my mind about him. But in the meantime, just let the matter rest for awhile. If he did feel the same way, he will know what to do.

Oh ya...I think that Im gonna feel sad because one of my close-frens is going to graduate. We fought a lot, always arguing...but deep down inside, I love her as my own sister. I do not know how to express and like I mentioned. I have a looot to learn for this musy-mushy stuffs.

k la, continue next entry. will be going back to IIUM this Friday & for now, just live the present and for the future!!!



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Now playing: Faizal Tahir - Cuba
via FoxyTunes

Confusion...

When you encounter with something that you are not sure about it, what would you do?

Would you sit for a while & ponder for some creative solutions, or just let the matter hanging like that?

Would you ask advices from those people that you trust or try to solve it through your own way?

As for me, I would rather let the matter hanging for a while & seeks help from Allah and people who I trust...then, when the right time comes, I will take the suitable steps and make my way through the confusion...

And for the things that have been bothering me for these few days, I have decided to put stop on it and take a look from the other perspective. For example, for the confusion about that guy, I have decided to just let him be...If he got feelings for me, he will know what to do. If he just being nice with me, then I will also be nice to him.

So that is as simple as things should be...Sometimes, we tend to make things complicated ourselves...We blamed the other variables, insted of blaming ourselves....

And yeah, I did make things complicated myself without realizing the consequences of my thoughts...

Positive thoughts = positive outcomes, Fadiah... Remember that!

Being HuMAn

May peace be upon you...

Last week had been a tiring week for me...physically and emotionally tiring...

Today, I'm back in S'pore...couldn't sleep...that's why I decided to blog...

And just now, I accidentally stumbled upon a beautiful video (below is the link) and its kinda inspired me somehow...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQTVkSjspNs

Having a lot of things to do, assignments to submit, meetings to attend etc. makes me feel myself is scattering and could not pull myself together...

But when I go back to s'pore, looking into my parents' face, talking to them...makes me realize that I am not alone...

I can be strong no matter what comes against me...

I can handle the situation and stabilize my emotional...

I realize that sometimes it is easy to be said than done....

During last week, I remembered that I cried so much without no one notices it...

It does not mean that I am trying hard to prove to others that I am strong....it is just not my way to show others what my real feelings are...bcoz
(1) I do not want them to bother about my stupid feelings
(2) I am trying hard to be strong here...so plez, support me k...

I am just a normal human being...full of mistakes, mistakes and mistakes....so when I done something wrong, it does not mean I don't realize it...but sometimes it is just I overlooked it and forget about it...